It has been one year since my older daughter had her febrile seizure. That’s 365 days. 365 days of worry, anxiety, and fear that it will happen again. 365 days of research, therapy, doctor visits, and constant temperature checking. I had never gone from so high after my team’s Super Bowl comeback and victory to so low in 24 hours. Now that the Super Bowl weekend is over, my mind goes back to that day.
As of now, my daughter has only had one febrile seizure episode. She has had fevers, but for whatever reason, they did not spike quickly enough to cause a seizure. Her fevers certainly have been high at times (104+), but they typically are accompanied by other symptoms. Unlike her symptom-free fevers of the past, we celebrate ‘normal kid illnesses’ like a drippy cold or an ear infection.
Over this last year, I have a learned a few things about febrile seizures and myself as a mother:
- Febrile seizures are terrifying to witness. I have spoken with several parents whose child has experienced them, and they were just as shaken up as I was. Whether you have seen one or five, I can’t imagine it ever feeling less terrifying when it’s happening. We all felt like we had a degree of PTSD after witnessing it.
- You cannot stop one from happening. Regardless of how many professionals have told me this, I still feel as though I can prevent a febrile seizure. I can tell my daughter’s temperature from a quick peck on the forehead, but the thermometer is my sidekick. The minute she reaches over 100.4, I am giving her Motrin and Tylenol. The timers are set so the medicines do not get out of her system, and I am watching her every move. Yes, I sound insane, but I am trying my best to stay on top of it.
- I feel more prepared if it were to happen again. I hope and pray that neither of my children have another febrile seizure. Maybe this was just a weird fluke, and her body needed a reset. But if it does happen, I will have a better sense of what to do. In short, check the time (see how long they last), make sure she is safe (on her side in my arms or on the ground), try to cool her down, and call 9-1-1. I was told that you do not even have to call 9-1-1 if it is a simple febrile seizure, but try telling that to a panicked parent holding a convulsing child.
- I hope that no one else who loves my child witnesses it. I talk openly about how my daughter looked while having it and what it was like. But until you are the one there, it is impossible to envision. I hope for the sake of my husband, family, and friends that no one ever has to witness it again. Myself included.
It has been one year since my daughter’s febrile seizure, and I am trying not to be so afraid if and when it happens again. I try not to panic when the Mom Alarm goes off and the thermometer reads over 100.4. I try to tell myself that I would be calmer and less frantic if it did happen again. I try to reach out to terrified parents who have experienced one for the first time. I try to not assume my younger daughter will have one too (even though it is more likely that she will). I try to be strong for both my girls.
Leah Moser 